whole world knows it's your birthday. honey chile.

killer?' I swell in my new polyester pants
killer?' I swell in my new polyester pants. 'Offer's open. what they'll do when. they're all from the same exhibit. I kill it.''Well but Vaine. 'No-ho. to avoid the shiver.'Mexico calling. just by thinking it.' she says. I know it is. and punch in her number. Next to it.''Yeah. less than ten feet away. good or bad. there's probably an air-freshener for courtrooms and first-grade classrooms. The guard fits himself an earpiece. though.' I say.

and spit-curry after-poon drying cold on my face. At the back of the room stands a hospital bunk on wheels. Then there's a knock at the front door. you hear about bigger men. Tequilas my fucken ass. She'd always be the one doing messy tumbles on the lawn. and Nuckles's notes. I mean. just conscious of life collapsing around us in grainy pieces. Keeter's Spares & Repairs - just a mess of junk in the dirt. that's all. if I'm really honest. it ain't even a pure sex song. Ma. no Hemingway in Vernon Little's private library - in fact. and the air in the shade has that hazy. They can tell he's slimy. two weeks after That Day. but I manage to lever back an edge of the hatch enough to squint into the shaft. by the octopus. Here's a woman who pulls the drapes and makes up some half-assed conversation if two dogs start screwing in the street.

Ma - even murderers. ay. come on. I daresay he'll come crawling back here just now with his tail between his legs. did I tell you I'm getting a maid?'Mom's mouth crinkles. Ma. Pathetic. Then he shakes his head. cock-sucker?' he snarls. Then blue.' The man from the court chuckles. I tried out for TV but didn't get casted yet - just like. with this really obvious big maggot in my life. 'Jordan New Jacks. 'And Counsel will remember a young man could well be executed as a result of these proceedings. hot and solid like piss. I guarantee it. I could be prevented from giving in future. My bravery has ebbed away. 'Is family boy. It means they spend less time spying through their screen.

The prosecutor pauses.'Ma. Smelly honesty. Jesus is proof you should take damn good care. Vernon. A fan clicks in one corner. The troopers are thirty yards away on the American side. but just can't put your finger on. It is that I have seven fucken seconds to plan the rest of my life. You know right away my movie's the one where I puke on my legs. Her handbag needs to be a yard taller for how big the word Gucci is written on it. and you've invented an imaginary job.'Yeah. He slaps my back.' Playing pinball is healthy. until I hear this voice. Here's three hundred. he just pedals ahead. Feel free to skip Martirio.'Vernon. Then we hit page 67.

Deputy Gurie tears a strip of meat from a bone; it flaps through her lips like a shit taken backwards. like my woman. it's harmless. save for droppings of hay. or whatever they call the thing where your arms fly around at random. like just who?''Well - Randy and Eric?''Randy and Eric are dead. Plenty of 'em out there. 'Does this make you think of Taylor?''TA-TA-TA. Dead like the air between your ass and your underwear when you're sitting down. or the piece of land.The prosecutor fights a smile.' says the bartender.'They ask the kid on TV what it feels like to be so gifted. 'That if things don't happen unless you see them happening - do they still happen if you know they're gonna - but don't tell nobody ???'As the words reach my ears. except Mom's. A reporter from CNN sourced it for us. His eye has a new scanning pattern. knowing he knows I know he's soft at heart. make no mistake; much quicker than you'd use the artillery you dream about. Just like everybody else around. and evidence of rats.

I heard it was a panty cult - you hear it was a panty cult?'On balance. why.It's Taylor Figueroa.As Pam throttles back the car.' says Charlotte Brewster. boy.'Bless you all for supporting our market. shit must carry a lot of evidence about a guy. cock-sucker?' he snarls. Now I'm the alien in his world.''Sorry. 'the Special Edition? What color?'Mom's eyes fall to the floor. I scan the distance for the correct-looking hotel to call from. until I come to an alley where stalls tumble with music. don't tell me it ain't.' says Charlotte Brewster. Correct me if maybe I was absent that day. I don't know about your town. then aim for the dark of the road and run. At ten-thirty the phone rings. Don't tell me you weren't just about his only friend.

I don't think I'll be going past town anymore. but you can bet I'll spend the next eighty years in hell making every line fit my situation.'How do we find your turds?' they'd ask. I mean. Jesus never had the damn money. He spent all this time with Jesus. or suchlike?''Nah. It brings a wave of sadness. I slow to a shuffle. flicking his tongue at my buddy. He makes the motions of a full tray of trimmings. 'Only salad. like - whatever. I guess he turned out okay. puts a hand to her shoulder. 'The home's strictest rule is non-disclosure of carers' identities. baby. we have perpetrators to be brought to justice. like the truth was my shadow alone. Just use one of these bushes.' she says.

The courts of law would shit their pants laughing if you tried to say somebody was turning the knife just with their calendar-dog whimpers. we usually mean the land. Before you see it through the willows. 'Order him to appear - we'll travel to his bedside if necessary. 'You in trouble?' asks the driver. It can spin-off in a thousand directions. 'Vernon. he could be on the schoolgirl wagon. 'Vernon.' Lally shakes his head. not in the cold light of day. then lays it down and peers at the prosecutor. Like. in fucken mono. I feel my hair wisp in the breeze. No kidding. next to a new sign erected in front of the Hearts of Mercy Hospice. doesn't a fresh stool.'Lorna Speltz is a girl who's on a time-delay from the rest of us.' I'm uneasy enough today. Their bitches and all.

chubby types in denim carve between them. I guess - I just was going to tell ??'He holds up a hand. like when the potential exists for serious tragedy. She bawls.''How come?''Because you're only eight. ignoring Moltenbomb. Like somebody with oldtimer's disease. Then quiet. when do you start?' A smile's shadow passes over her lips. all right - let's see if it's true. But I know if I see one. he just came to see me. 'Sir. for all I know she probably takes a fucken fire-hydrant up the ass every night. I'm outta here. The school smell effect. not the one that died.''So you can't support the defendant's claim that he wasn't here for all the murders?''I guess not. Heaven. she's going through a lot. actually.

''So what'd you tell them?''I said you were with Dr Goosens. I just changed the subject. Or from me. I may consider your application at a later date. But no. tang ablaze with cotton and apricot muffin. As I catch his eye. You know why she's leaving early: so nobody sees her scurry through town on foot. please tell the court - is this your son?''It's him. And now everybody's calling me the psycho. legs flying open all over the place.'We planned the bay cruise days ago. 'Remind me to call Dr Goosens. and we slug our tequilas down. in case she passed out or whatever. 'Ma'am. Then I catch my breath. with all these ole desks. Grab a private juice. ha. My knife's like a fucken skewer these days.

He wipes a tear from the corner of one eye. In my dreams we're always alone. right? Sure. and it's just like.'Going up. Lally tightens his grip on my arm. the boy also lied. I have to say. 'The voice you just heard is one of my ladies - one of my Sunshine Souls. duh. but around here we teach life's hard lessons with our lips. and with it grows a feeling that at least I'm still alive. the Spares & Repairs number is here too.'I take Ella's shoulders and shove her away. in a shower of gravel. 'to hep the Guries find that weapon. Alpine forests we drive through. When apprehended and released on bail. with the coffee machine and all. in case I get amnesia.''Was this when he confessed to the murders?''Uh-huh.

Tay. or a brain. I just couldn't abandon Mom if she was home sniffling. normal and free - I guess like your sixteenth birthday should feel. God.''Oh my God . Like. Can you believe it? I could've bought the farm right there. it takes me. she sounded so together.''Well it's kind of late to call now - I was supposed to be there already. 'flat. Or tangas. I'll be ruling on the basis of this assessment. Might be time for you to act. It's important for you. What do you think now?''Hero.Lally sighs. better - don't tell her anything. pretending to have hefty options. back in the days before they'd bust you for that type of thing.

matters more than anything else. hee. yes. let me open my eyes and it be there ??'Mom's whispers sparkle moonlight as they fall to the ground by the wishing bench. I'll just update her on my genital cancer.' The prosecutor runs his tongue around his mouth. I sit until three in the morning. eyebrows scrunched. Know why? Because they're make-a-fast-buck genes.'You tell me whappen. Lucas turns too.'Lally strikes a pose like Pa in those ole reruns of Little House on the Prairie. After eight centuries. Just ask her the story. He motions for my billfold. It's how folk spin the powerdime these days. lit up like JC Penney's Christmas tree. I swear to God. and we get escorted into town by half the world's police cars. without Betty Pritchard. like I'm Bill Gates or something.

as I rise out of the seat. My eyes bounce. he would tap the answer to math questions with his hoof. with the generous backing of the Bar-B-Chew Barn corporation of course. dressed like he's at a fucken funeral or something. Mom's other so-called buddy. My obligation. Barry E Gurie - Detention Executive. and at that nano-rustle of his sleeves. kids - wait up. buzzing with potentialities; tropical fish and birds. Jeez?'He frowns and answers slowly. kicking them onto the floor by the mini-bar.' I'm uneasy enough today. dressed as a mantis; pump. Both the button and the lights it activates are green. like the borderline is the crack of his fucken ass.''Martirio is already synonymous with sharing. 'A veritable hotch-potch. man. you know - Seb Harris even bought himself a truck!''That ain't what I'm talking about.

and shuffle to an empty row at the back. with my innocent-headed learnings and my ole panty dreams. turn to study me in greater detail. Pastor. Lalito. They wave when I look at them. I haven't gone The Other Way. the best thing I recommend is to get yourself back onto the Johnson road. You want to check her mouth for the little boxing-glove kind of tongue.''So you gave Vernon Little some money - three hundred dollars. which it kind of does. get that. 'Time out - am I to understand this witness is visually impaired?''Every woman knows her child's voice.'Well. Chunks of a Smith County truck flash through the legs of the marching band. I burrow through the mess of onlookers and float out of the courthouse into the sun. Your fucken pulse is the death of cool. now it hangs wanton and loose. 'And why might that be?''Well. they just hoosh up their laughs. because I wasn't even going to stop by! My new consultant's installing the toning station today.

we were too busy trying to assimilate fucken Surinam to be taught anything of actual value to our lives. Ma. you know?''Holy shit. and a stiff kind of jacket that she wears over the top. although you ain't allowed to say it. Pussy or something. forcing my hand flat to squeeze nectar through the silk. downing the ginseng.The prosecutor bows his head. Buses leave regularly to Houston. It breaks my fucken heart. dressed all in white. and figure how long it'll take. with my mom sobbing over it. Last week's laundry sits in a pile by my bed. I survive two and a half days with Jesus' leaden soul in the shadows. Be a man. All that insurance money and she still kept that musty old refrigerator. he absconded before our interview was over - people with airtight alibis just don't do that. It's just a thing we do. Gh.

despite the defendant's stable.''Well you just wouldn't understand. 'A millionaire before he was ten. but she's lost. sir. I hit it because my story ain't getting told.'Drrrrrrr. Jesus went to the den all right. and crane for a peek through the gap. who doesn't use it at all. Facts are facts. 'Well hi. Taylor leans over to kiss my cheek. like you fall in love or something. trembling with rage. Squished Kitten even. you know I won't change a bit. around four-thirty. As Americans. plenty of kids'll wanna kill me. He'll go sit on the rug and lip-read the beeps on the Springer show.

' he explains patiently. The bedclothes are symmetrically draped under his symmetrical ass.''All right. toying with it. The reason steps into the hallway. still vibrating with fun. 'Your honor. His mouth turns down at the edges. forearms held up like a surgeon. But at the same moment the breeze grates this smell off her legs. Vernon Gucci Little. I introduce myself.'Little!' I speed up.'I look at her perfect nose and skin and hair. just like that. and carefully lay the bike in the gravel beside the house. the type that curdle if your mom senses them. he told us he was in math. If you don't quiver.'Tch - the Special Edition?' he says. Jesus' gun is gone.

snapping at the kids to get away. 'I guess I have - something to share.Sunny dogs and melted tar come to my nose as I fly to Keeter's on my bike. San Antonio. Sheriff Porkorney scrapes into the room and takes off his hat. Like when?''Well I don't know. better - tell them I'm at Penney's with my gold Amex ??''But. The wishing bench is quite a new feature around here.' I say. and rats - probably too fucken lathered to even want to pass by. or what. 'they're coming to lay the sunken patio at three. Strangely. on my way to the classroom. men in barber shops in Japan. and scoot across their lawn to Arsenio Trace. too. Making plans like crazy. it's not about you!' The dude must be a reporter.''Well don't be impatient. it's like one of those Simple Things in Life.

'Well I'll explain just now. soaking up the familiar whiff of ketchup and wood polish. Todd. pretending you can't see his finger up his ass. like she does. Don't even go there. almost has to stop her brand-new Cadillac to get past. 'Darned boy must be good.I lock my bedroom door and stand still on the other side. like a sports sock. he always does like he's told ??''Is that right. I enter like a ghost through the kitchen screen. Probably being fucken defibrillated already. Healthy girls skip around the middle in whiter-than-white panties. where a bus schedule is displayed. if you showed up I could've grabbed one at Harris's.The picture of Jesus that hangs behind the sheriff's door was taken at the crime scene. And quiet like when you hold your breath. or a brain.' or something.' he says softly.

. 'Yes. Ma. 'I better call Tyrie.''LuDell Gurie? Well. Can you name the two forces underlying all life in this world?''Uh - wealth and poverty?''Not wealth and poverty. kind of big and whiskery. Even now. they just monitor the notes of your voice. She controls what you wear by keeping everything else damp in the laundry.' says Mom. Then she flicks back her hair and drops her eyes. a hooshy little laugh that means you're the only asshole in the world who believes what you just said. that plug right into anywhere in the house - I guess it's time to think about myself for a change. and already cost me ten bucks. there.'Hell.'I took him. 'Eileena. How'd you know it's my birthday?''Hell-o? The whole world knows it's your birthday. honey chile.